Vanquish Self-Defeating Thought Patterns in 3 Easy Steps

Thinking woman

Can you feel good for just 17 seconds?

In my research I have read that if you can have good-feeling thoughts for 17 seconds then this starts a momentum of more good-feeling thoughts. So when I feel a little down I love the thought that I am only 17 seconds away from feeling good again.

Give it a try. Think of one thing right now that makes you feel good. Maybe you have a vacation or time off coming up, what will you do? Do you have a fun event planned for next weekend? Or does having time to yourself on a lazy Sunday afternoon make you feel happy? Whatever improves your mood will help you get that momentum of good thoughts moving.

Why is feeling good so important? This is your natural state of being. Did you know that the reason you do anything in life is because you believe it will make you happier?

An easy way to get your 17 second momentum going is to think about what you want, not what you don’t want. When you have a desire, do you instantly start thinking of the things that you don’t want.

Let’s say you want to lose 10 pounds, do you instantly start thinking of all the negative aspects of having to lose weight like “I don’t want to change what I eat” or “I don’t want to have to get up early to go to the gym.”

Instead focus on what you do want. I want to lose 10 pounds because I want to feel lighter and healthier.

To give you a personal example, I was recently thinking about what I didn’t want about a situation in my life. Luckily I caught myself in the act and decided to stop this self-defeating thought pattern so that I could get back on track with feeling good. Here is an example of that thought process.

I need to focus now on what I want not what I don’t want. I want to feel safe and free and at ease. I want to just know that everything is going to work out in my favor.

Logically if I think about it everything always does work out in my favor. I seem to be programmed to put up a fuss anyway. Like I have to add unneeded drama to every situation in my life.

What if I released the need for that drama and I stayed focused instead on what I want? I will practice seeing what I want every time that drama tries to sneak into my awareness.

Everything is moving towards my greater good anyway so why do I need this drama? It is an unnecessary emotion that makes me feel bad and I don’t like it. But it is so engrained in my being from years of thinking this way.

I am ready to break this negative thought pattern right now. It no longer serves me and I know better now. I know that I create my own reality so why would I create a reality that doesn’t serve me? As tapping expert Brad Yates says, “It’s just old programming.”

All I need to do is to feel good for 17 seconds and then I will have a matching thought and so on. It is that simple. Today I will focus on just feeling good for 17 seconds at a time.

I hope this example gave you an idea of how to improve your thoughts in a very short period of time. To recap here are three easy steps to vanquish self-defeating thought patterns and help you to begin a momentum of good-feeling thoughts:

  1. Become aware of your self-defeating thoughts.
  2. State your desire and decide what you want instead of what you don’t want.
  3. Create a positive statement and repeat this statement for 17 seconds.

Continue repeating your positive statement for another 17 seconds until you have another good-feeling thought. You may be amazed at how good you feel in a short period of time. Just a warning only use this technique if you are ready to turn your frown upside-down.

What do you usually do to create good-feeling thoughts? Blog


  • Kendis

    Reply Reply April 21, 2015

    It’s very hard to shift to this way of thinking when it has been a long time since I’ve felt any kind of prolonged happiness. I’ve been stuck in a limbo of anxiety and self defeat., self sabotage. I’m the great pretender.


      Reply Reply April 21, 2015

      Thank you so much for your comment and for sharing your feelings. It may seem difficult to shift your thoughts when you have built such a momentum of anxious, self-defeating, and self-sabotaging thoughts. These thoughts may have started like a slow moving train but now they have gathered some speed but you have the ability to change this by retraining your thoughts. A simple step to retraining your thoughts as I discussed in this blog post is to focus on something that makes you feel good for 17 seconds. You can simply accomplish this by petting your cat or dog, thinking of a fun event you have planned, or just count for 17 seconds (this will take your focus away from your thoughts) Believe it or not this is how you begin a momentum of better feeling thoughts. Your next step would be to try going for another 17 seconds.I may be asking you to step out of your usual thought pattern. Give it a try and let me know how it goes.

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